In this episode, you will learn about Freedom, values and the fact that my mum makes the best brownie ever.
What is Freedom for you?
During the previous episode, someone asked me “What is Freedom for you?”. I thought that would be great to answer this question.
Before answering this question, let me ask you 2 quick test from the NLP World page :
- * the wheelbarrow test: if you can put it into a wheelbarrow, it is NOT a nominalisation. E.g. A drink is a noun, but it is not a nominalisation… as it is tangible, it can be put into a wheelbarrow and carried around. Quality control fails the wheelbarrow test and is a nominalisation.
- * If the word continuous can be put in front of the noun and still make sense. E.g. improvement becomes continuous improvement, hence improvement is a nominalisation. (The fact that continuous can be added indicates that there is a dynamic aspect to this static element).
Let’s see how does that work for “Freedom”, can we put “freedom” in a wheelbarrow? Nope. We can’t. Let’s see if we can put the word continuous in front of Freedom: continuous freedom. Does that work? yes it does.
Now, we know that we are facing what we call in NLP a “Normalisation”. In other words, it is a word that has not a tangible existence. Giving a proper definition of this word is depending on the map of the world of each person.
In the video, i give you my definition of what is freedom, and it might slightly differ from yours or from the one in the dictionary. Be reassured, there is no right or wrong definition.
The Brownie effect
I asked my mum’s Recipe to make brownie this what happen next!
Have you ever tried to do a recipe and it does not work? You may have asked someone who does a great dish to give you his recipe, and no matter how hard you try to do it, it does not work.
My mum and one of my good friend are the two-person who make the best Brownie i have ever tried so far.
When i move to my own place, i asked my mum to give me her recipe to make the brownie.
First thing i did in my new place, try to do it myself. Guess what?
It had nothing to do with what my mother was doing, either directly or indirectly.
It did not taste the same, the texture was not the same. Nothing was the same. I did not get the same brownie.
Have you ever had this kind of experience? I bet you had.
I tried it again. I take my, time, make sure i follow each step of the recipe, right?
Guess what? Failed again.
Either because i am very committed (yeah self-improvement power baby), or stubborn (my ex would say so), i tried again.
Guess what? Failed again.
After a few other attempts, I start, doubting the recipe. I get back to my mum and ask if she gave the right recipe. She said to me that she gave me the right recipe and told me that i might be doing something wrong.
As you can guess, i was not really happy, to hear that i was doing something wrong from the recipe, right? How would you have to react?
I react by trying again, and followed EXACTLY what she said, word for word.
Guess what happened?
Yes, i FAILED AGAIN!!!!
After so many attempts, i started to doubt now about myself. Saying to myself that maybe i was not meant to cook. I won’t be able to make a proper brownie.
Most of all, i was ashamed because i have told all my friend, that i would make them the best brownie because i got this unique recipe from my mum.
After a while, i was so upset and angry at me, I put my pride away and decided to go to my mum, with all the ingredients so she can show me how to do it properly.
This feeling, when you think you know something, you have seen it done so many times, but you are no able to do it and need to go back to see one more time?
Yes, this feeling, i was there.
The first thing she said: “This is not the right ingredients.”
She said, yes, you bought a different brand, and those are not good to make the brownie.
I was speechless. For me, Flour is Flour, Sugar is sugar, eggs are eggs and so on.
Right? OF COURSE NOT.
So, she makes a list of exactly which ingredients she used in her recipe so i can get them and then she said we will do it together, so you will then be able to do it.
This is what we have done, during the process, i realised, that every single parameter of the recipe had significant importance in the process.
The time she switches on the oven, so it is not too hot.
The size of the cake dish, the order of putting everything together.
Together we went on to all the process, i asked a lot of questions:
- Why did she pick this flour and not any other one,
- Why this brand of sugar
- Why the order to mix everything and so on. She answered me for everything, and the standard answer was :
- I tried everything, and with this one, I get results.
And since then, I’ve been making a brownie almost as good as my mother’s.
Much love to you.